Unforgiven in the diaspora (Vol. IV)

I stay away from mirrors when i cant recognise my face
I've had to erase, rewind, replace and redisign who i am in this place
Son of man or freedom fighter
they should have my portrait on a cigarette lighter
so the world will know how i burn

I will grow in turn, I must
i will show i learned to trust
then misinterprete the signals before me
i've made mistakes and i'm not sorry

I'm The Unforgiven

and to think some men call this living!
Sure, fill me up with ill-intending women
and never-ending booze
you snooze, you lose
but i choose to keep those inebriated hands away from my shirt
for beyond this fine embroidered cotton
is a world of endless hurt
that has no bottom

So why, then, do i stay in this city?
I wonder what happens to all this pity i feel for myself
look at me: still young and in good health
not drowning in wealth but i survive
how come i'm still wishing for that ticket, destination: Alive?
I mean, here's my passport, here's my name
here's my baggage and here's my shame
intials T.U., The Unforgiven
now let me into your land of the living

You know, Life, you can be a pain in the ass
you claim to be a teacher but you ignore your class
and you put me through shit, and you seem to enjoy it
i'll be honest, this limbo stage is getting real annoying
you think i'll give in? think i'll raise the white flag?
I can be a badass, too, the baddest you ever had
see i might be fatigued, scarred, misguided and still doing wrong
but take a good look, you sumamabitch, i'm still going strong.

Christmas Wish

I used to love fanta, man
used to share a bottle with my cousins waitin on the Santaman
but not the fat guy with the presents, red suit and a beard
i'm talking about having my whole family present and near
just pouring out of granny's house, kids spilling into the yard
i'm talking bout the kind of christmas you wont find in a hallmark card
the air filled with the aroma of food enough to feed a nation
boiling in humungous pots watched over by ladies full of jubilation
holding back children creating havoc and building a ravenous hunger
i'm talking about this spell of universal togetherness we seemed to be under
babies screaming, babies yelling, babies laughing and babies crying,
this spirit so beautiful it gave life back to men who were dying
men playing omuweeso and telling ancient jokes
i remember licking at the bottoms of empty fanta bottles and cokes
and starving and waiting and running around to try and forget
until someone yelled out, "Food is ready, come and get!"
and how we raced to fill our stomachs till we douldnt take no more
yet we went on eating till our tummies were sore
and endless relatives who seemed to invent themselves for that day
they came out in record numbers but no one got turned away
nobody cared who showed up, no one asked any questions
we came together for that one day and just handed out blessings
there was so much food, mountains of it in jajja's house
but even more than that, there was so much love flowing out
all was forgiven, old wounds were miraculously healed
like nothing could ruin that day, Christmas was like a shield
because it wasnt about the gifts or even the birth of Christ
it was family laughing together and everyone just being nice
just so much food, so much love, so much has changed since then
man, Christmas used to mean something, i remember back when-

-when the air was filled with that beautiful Christmas spirit
still somewhere inside me, every now and then i hear it
so my Christmas wish, dear Angel at the top of my tree
is that this year you could give my childhood Christmas back to me.

The Last Kiss

I'm so at fault

we laid down the rules
locked emotions up in a vault
and threw away the key
but love isnt taught in schools
it is a game for fools
and such a fool is me

we agreed "no strings"
i thought i could work passed this
and it was working
till i got tied up by that list kiss
fell into this madness!

what now?
am i simply to go?
let them know if they know
i cant walk away!
yet after that last kiss
i can not stay
not like this

we've played too long
its not a game if it leaves you sore
i'm so in the wrong
but after that last kiss, i want more